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  • BY LAURA CARNEY

Not Drowning, but Resting

August 08, 2017 by Laura Carney

"I only went out for a walk, and finally concluded to stay out till sundown," said John Muir, "for going out, I found, was really going in."

As the current died down I decided to risk walking a little again. I stumbled a few times and was now getting impatient. I was standing close to the edge of what might be a waterfall to the left of me, I wasn't sure. But I couldn't see what was below the precipice. And then I decided to try to stand still and not be knocked over, just to see what might happen.

And then I closed my eyes and prayed.

Please calm these waters, I said silently.

Like some kind of Jedi mind trick, it worked. I suddenly felt warm, and I opened my eyes and saw the sun had come out. As it blanketed its yellow rays on me and the river around me, a butterfly flitted by, over the now calm waters.

I looked around. I was only one swimmer, one person, standing in the middle of this vast body of water, surrounded by mountains and sun. I was the only person experiencing what I was experiencing right where I was—well, except for Steven and the family picnicking on the shore, who I was certain believed I was a lunatic at this point. But they weren't there in the water with me. My viewpoint was mine alone.

It made all the risk to reach that point worth it.

As I walked forward slowly, every time I fell didn't hurt as much. Whether the waters stayed calm or not didn't matter. What mattered was I believed they were.

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August 08, 2017 /Laura Carney
myfatherslist, swimthewidthofariver, openwaterswimming, gertrudederle, ymca, marktwain, huckfinn, julesverne, asheville, item24, safedriving, intentionalliving, singing, mindfulness, bluemind
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The Finest Wine America Has Made

March 30, 2017 by Laura Carney

“I know that only by owning who and what you are can you start to step into the fullness of life," said Oprah Winfrey. "Every year should be teaching us all something valuable."

I turn 39 today. And I know I'm supposed to feel old, because it's the last year of my 30s.

But strangely I feel younger than ever, probably based on the work I'm doing, based on how authentic I've been allowing myself to be.

Born on March 30, 1978, I'm exactly 30 years younger than my father-in-law, Bob. My cousin's husband Lee shares my exact birthday and year. And I'm exactly 30 years older than my only niece, Savannah, who today turns 9. This is notable when you remember that I'm the only girl of five in my immediate family and Savannah is the only girl of five amongst her cousins.

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March 30, 2017 /Laura Carney
item59, march30, myfatherslist, 39, safedriving, aginggracefully, livingfully, singatmydaughterswedding, birthday, intentionallife, aging
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